A simple talk shared with friends in my dimly lit den at 403 is taking the shape of a belief rather superstition in whatever I have been doing recently. In fact to my surprise I even relate to the past events in my life following the same overrated piece of conversation.
It was post dinner, my friends and I were delving in our regular routine- a few desserts with too much smoke engulfing the room. The topic of the day was : Past Relationships. Everyone was laughing away discussing the times of "I was 16 and hopelessly in love" , "I thought I will get married to him/her" etc. Matters like this, did not amuse me.
Evidently, I was listening to others and thinking of how lucky they were to have had the opportunity to walk away from someone knowing that hearts were broken and pictures (mental + glossy ones) were burnt. I unfortunately, had never got an opportunity to be the "dumper".
A friend randomly said- Ishi you know in a pack of cards, there are two jokers allowed and once they are exhausted there are just real cards to play with. THIS VERY STATEMENT HAS TAKEN OVER ME.
And so it all began; the thinking process -I changed two schools to finally get to the one I loved, I had to change my Engineering major twice to be a Medical systems engineer that I am today, I ditched two short jobs to get to the one I am loving currently, I even changed my college institution twice to get to Sheffield, two residences to get to West One 403 and on and on and on...
Slowly, this outrage started transcending to the very minute things I did. An example being: checking anything twice before I could believe it, even party invites so ye.
Upon discussing it with someone, his immediate reaction was obviously an explosive laughter - a calm pause followed by a plea to not try skydiving / bungee jumping or marriage for that matter. C'mon who wants to go through it twice to realise it was the third time when things got real.
It made me think, there are people for whom everything just flows smooth. Fancy English medium schools to expensive Universities to dream jobs; its just the obvious demand but for someone like me it was always a staircase that led upwards to something I wanted. Yes the struggle is more , but I certainly think the climb is worth it.
ye ye , I know Grapes are sour. Of course I would want to be the former category but I developed the love to see the suspense at the end of my staircase.
I would walk into a store with just this hope that I find my size, a shoe shop with something I would like, an online exhibit with something I had in my mind, ice cream store hoping for the kiwi flavour, nail bar with the colour I fancy, etc.
The expectation made it so exciting. The wait if I could not get what I wanted ; even more exciting. The alternate plans: epic.
It was like waiting for the jokers to end and real stuff to play with (sometimes literally, wink)
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